Detox/Cleanse (aka, what am ah daein ta myself?)

October is tomorrow n it’s a great month. Now that it’s fall, ahm thinkin bout tha upcomin wintah, n tha fact that it’s been two fawkin years since ah moved here, n otha stuff. N have decided it’s time fer me ta try a cleanse.

Ahve gawn on some detoxes, but they were half-assed. N it’s nawt that ahm unhealthy, but ah dae drink soda, n eat processed food (usually meat substitute), n thar is tha boozin. So ah started tryin ta find somethang that would fit me well – n didn’t.

Tha Master Cleanse is fawkin insane – no way. Ah was thinkin a two week er so deal, but that allowed me ta eat solids so long as they were good fer me. Aftah enuff time on tha internet, ah finally decided ah needed ta put my own program togetha. Ahm still fine-tunin tha supplements ahll need fer part two, but here it is in a nutshell:

Part 1: Oct 1 – 9
– No

  • Alcohol
  • Junk Food (candy, chips, etc)
  • Soda
  • Processed/Excessively Fried Foods
  • Street Food (burritos, pizza, etc

Ahm also gaein ta try n sleep earlier n wake up earlier to prepare fer Part 2, as well as git ta yoga at least 4 times.

Part 2: Oct 10 – 23/24th
– No

  • Drugs, except for Caffeine, and only one cup of Green Tea per day tops
  • Dairy
  • Sugars
  • Eggs
  • Gluten
  • Wheat

In addition, ahll be takin supplements for things like protein, my liver, and other health-related things to keep me balanced and healthy.

Ah recently purchased a Juicer and will be spending more time shopping for food, attending farmers markets to ensure I’m eating locally and fresh. My garden may provide some greens, although not likely enough to make much of a difference.

Halfway through this, I’m planning on taking a day where I abstain from solid food altogether, and will likely try to fast as much as ah can.

Ahd like ta git ta yoga 5 times during this time period.

Part 3: Oct 24/25 – Oct 30:
(Tha date is ambiguous b/c there’s a Wee the Band gig on the 24th so ah haven’t decided if ah wanna end my cleanse tha day of, or tha day aftah)
Similar to Part 1, depending on how I feel, and what worked for me. Ahll likely ease back intae certain foods of kerse. If ah git ta 4 more yoga classes, then ahll have done 12 fer tha month, which is about what ah like ta be – perhaps ahll be more ambitious then that….

Then Oct 31st, it’s Saturday n it’s Samhein, so all bets are off.

We start in tha mornin, hopefully w. yoga!

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