(Even if you both werk-trade thar).<\/p>\n
Ah was awkwardly “picked up” yestahday mornin (it’s in quotes b\/c her actual intentions ahve yet ta decipher) by a fellow werk-trader. We exchanged awkward pleasantries in tha mornin, she laughed at my jokes, n then ended up stayin fer a second class (“because it was rainin – a lil weird, but ah was maybe flattered?). She also moved her mat rite next ta mine which was also strange. Actually, she asked fer my numbah before all that – she asked what my cell was n when ah asked her why, she stammered “so ah ken put it in my phone.” Fair enuff, n ah like women who pursue thangs\/people they like, so ah gave it ta her. Ah asked “So what happens now” n she told me “you’ll see.” Ah guess ah saw, but ah definitely don’t unnerstand (please note that ah have paid tha utmost attention ta detail in recreatin these text messages):<\/p>\n
Crazy Yoga Girl (11:30 am – just after giving her my number): may i Plz hau That Nmbr?<\/p>\n
Me (3:28 pm): Welcome to my phone book, cyg, mission accomplished. How are u spendin the rest of this Sunday?<\/p>\n
CYG (4:10 pm): TxtualRelationz1drfl (this translates to “Textual Relations — see Urban Dictionary<\/a>, Wonderful (1drfl – ah had ta look it up too).<\/p>\n Me (4:27 pm): Yer textin is more advanced then mine but ah ken find online translations. Nae such reference guide exists fer mine yet.<\/p>\n Me (5:13 pm): Longest nite! (in case she was shy or whatever, I’m at least trying to encourage conversation…nawt fer much longah tho)<\/p>\n Me (6:38 pm): *fizzle* (as in my interest)<\/p>\n CYG (1:07 pm): WutLiz@TBTOfTOcnNShAks?GiuUp?ANerusWrek (eventually this was deciphered as “What Lies at the bottom of the ocean and shakes? Give up? A Nervous Wreck.” I’m getting tired of this by now)<\/p>\n Me (1:41 pm): Unsubzkribe<\/p>\n CYG (1:46 pm): IDGI (I don’t get it)<\/p>\n Me (1:55 pm): Nae mas porfa. Gratzi n ciao<\/p>\n CYG (1:57 pm): GratzUhurtMyFelngs.DoYQMe? (Great, you hurt my feelings, do you question me?)<\/p>\n Me (2:50 pm): The recipient of this message will no longer accept texts that require translation from your number. Please reformat and try again.<\/p>\n CYG (3:48 pm): ThatWuzAJOk.DoUNoAboutTheCarpets?Thnx4kpnquiet abt it. (I have no idea what this is)<\/p>\n Me (3:52 pm): Message undeliverable, the recipient is bored w this.<\/p>\n CYG (4:24 pm): AUI?WutzFizle? (beats the hell out of me)<\/p>\n Me (4:41 pm): Totally lame, im blocking all texts from this number now. Really (this was her last chance…)<\/p>\n CYG (4:44 pm): QL:QuitLaughingAUI:<\/p>\n Me (4:45 pm): That was the last one<\/p>\n and then I blocked her on Sprint.<\/p>\n Ah can’t help but thank its nawt actually a person who was daein this, some fawked up computah thang, but eitha way:<\/p>\n Don’t Evah Give Yer Numbah Ta Someone At a Yoga Studio<\/b> – even if they are cute and flexible.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" (Even if you both werk-trade thar). Ah was awkwardly “picked up” yestahday mornin (it’s in quotes b\/c her actual intentions ahve yet ta decipher) by a fellow werk-trader. We exchanged awkward pleasantries in tha mornin, she laughed at my jokes, … Continue reading